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Rainier Cherry, Lemon and Vegan Ricotta Gratin

I've developed a recent obsession with the NBC comedy 30 Rock. It's not just because I have a fangirl crush on Tina Fey in her sexy plastic cat glasses, relentless sass and shameless intimate relationship with food. Okay...maybe she's, like, 45% of what keeps me glued to the screen. In all truth, the writing  and comedic timing are great. There's blunt humor and characters that everyone can relate to on some personal level. I even find Alec Baldwin charming on the show. "Baldwin" and "charming" were two words I never expected to put together in a sentence, but c'est la vie. 

I'd never been an avid TV fanatic. As an actor, I tell myself I should watch TV as "research". I'll sit myself down, do some yoga-like deep breathing to mentally prepare myself for hours of CSI: Tahiti, Cold Case and Gossip Girl. Somehow, I end up crying as Jessica on the reality show Intervention sticks a needle in her arm as she divulges how her abusive father led to her heroin addiction/eating disorder/kleptomania/pedophilia. It's heart-wrenching, I tell ya'. 

Both 30 Rock and Intervention are Emmy-nominated shows this year, and it's because a level of honest humility added to drama or comedy makes great television. My roommate and I have been attending a lesbian film-makers workshop for the last few weeks. One of our writing assignments went awry, but it's too funny not to share. We were initially asked to write a fictionalized version of a home-living dynamic. I jokingly suggested that she detail living with a 24-year-old vegan trapped inside the body of June Cleaver (aka me). Being a crass, sarcastic and witty writer, she saw this as a golden idea.

I can't stop laughing about it, so I decided to include it as part of my post to really demonstrate my "humor rooted in truth" philosophy. Spoiler: This is a completely fictionalized character. Once again, this isn't true at all, but what fun is life if we can't laugh at ourselves a little? 
  
The Real World of Jenn Shagrin: Vegan Food Addict Extraordinaire
"Many may believer her ability to morph carnivorous dishes into animal-friendly-carrot-killing goodness is a gift. You have all been deceived. Veganism is a beautiful diet and lifestyle that I never believed could turn deadly and disease-ridden. I now know that it can...when in the wrong hands. Allow me to tell the tale of my roommate, Jenn Shagrin. Jenn started down the path of Veganism from a genuine place, avoiding all animal products for the greater good of the world. All was going well until she watched a documentary explaining that root vegetables feel the same emotions as humans. This triggered a rapid, downward spiral. Poor, sweet Jenn, who just wanted to curtail cruelty, has been diagnosed with Veganistic Agoranimal Anorexia. Once Jenn learned that root vegetables had feelings, she found it scientifically impossible that other all vegetables didn't have human-like emotions. As Jenn's mental state hit rock-bottom, she turned to Airatarianism. I watcher her finally snap. One week later at 3AM, she woke suddenly in a state of paranoia from a nightmare. An ancient tree had spoken to her. It chastised her over-consumption of the air they created, and not considering the trees feelings about "greediness." She grabbed a plastic bag and pulled it tightly over her head, not wanting to selfishly suck in particles that create life.  

This had gone too far. I wasn't going to lose Jenn. I was already starving and running out of money because my live-in chef stopped wanting to "hurt" vegetables. I care about her, and needed to intervene. Fueled by hanger and a lack of sleep from being suddenly woken, I ripped the bag off her head and shoved kale down her throat. She attempted to cry out, "Murder!", but it sounded more like, "Muhhmurrrr!". 

Jenn agreed to attending Healing Acres Vegan retreat. Their steady regimen of group therapy, vitamin B IVs, loads of Xanax and EMDR help her heal and regain strength. After 8 weeks, she was Jenn again! The tree-loving, fake-cheese-eating queen of the twenty first century. I still have to slip her a Xanax from time to time to, but only if I see her eyes go twitchy when a carrot looks at her the wrong way. She is doing so much better. She's not spending spending hours having conversations with patches of grass, and has returned to the kitchen. I'm glad life is back to normal." 

And on that note, this week's recipe:
Rainier Cherry, Lemon and Vegan Ricotta Gratin
For the Vegan Ricotta...
  • 12 oz Extra Firm Silken Tofu
  • 1 TBSP Fresh Lemon Zest
  • 1/2 tsp Sea Salt
  • 1/4 tsp Organic Sugar
  • 1 tsp Fresh Lemon Juice
For the Gratin...
  • 1 1/2 lbs Rainier Cherries, pitted and halved
  • 1 TBSP Fresh Lemon Juice
  • 1 TBSP Black-Currant Flavored Liqueur (or Raspberry Flavored)
  • 1/4 tsp Fresh Cracked Black Pepper
  • 6 TBSP Organic Sugar, divided in half
  • 1/8 tsp Sea Salt
  • 2 tsp Agar Powder
  • 1/2 cup + 2 TBSP Vegan Heavy Cream
  • 3 TBSP Slivered Almonds, toasted
In a large bowl, use a fork to mash together all of the Vegan Ricotta ingredients until the mixture has the texture of cottage cheese. Set aside. 

In a separate small bowl, combine the 1 TBSP of lemon juice, black currant liqueur and black pepper. Set aside. 

Start your oven's broiler pre-heating. 

Add the first 3 TBSP of organic sugar to a large skillet, and heat over medium-high heat until the sugar begins to melt ("clear" spots will start to appear), about 2 minutes. Add the pitted Rainier cherries to the pan, and let them cook 2 minutes without stirring. Pour the liqueur, lemon juice and black pepper mixture over the cherries, stir once, then cook an additional 2 minutes until thickened. Remove from heat. 

In the bottom part of a double boiler, begin bringing 2 cups water to a boil. Do not place the top part of the double boiler over the water yet. In the top half of the double boiler, add the remaining 3 TBSP of organic sugar, Heavy Cream and sea salt. 

Sprinkle the 2 tsp of agar powder over top of the Heavy Cream mixture, and allow to sit for 5 minutes. 

Turn the boiling water down to a fast simmer, stir the agar powder into the Heavy Cream mixture, then place the top half of the double boiler over the bottom half with the simmer water. Cook the Heavy Cream mix, whisking constantly, until the mixture has thickened considerably to a paste-like texture (about 2-3 minutes). 

Remove from heat, and beat on high with a hand mixer or vigorously with a whisk until the Heavy Cream mixture is fluffy and forms peaks. Pour the contents of the Rainier Cherry skillet into a gratin or casserole dish, then fold the Heavy Cream mixture into the Vegan Lemon Ricotta until combined. 

Spoon the Ricotta Mixture evenly over top of the Rainier Cherries, then place under the preheated broiler until the topping is browned. Sprinkle the toasted almond slivers over top, then allow to cool briefly before serving.

Comments

Eve Love said…
this cherry thing looks totaly CRAZY!!
The two of you together is the perfect blend of love and hilarity!

I'd never eaten a Rainier cherry before this summer and, man, I'd been missing something delicious!
HAHAHAHA! This was awesome! Seriously hilarious....

30 Rock IS great, almost as funny as my favorite: Arrested Development. Alas, nothing can compete with the Bluth family, but Tina Fey definitely comes close.

That dish looks fantastic, so creamy and delicious!
x said…
30 Rock is one of the best tv shows, ever!

I enjoyed reading The Real World of Jenn!
Holy Crap! WOW. Seriously, you are so creative. As usual, WANT.
When can I come camp out in your kitchen?
the twins said…
i love 30 rock too and your gratin looks amazing! =)
iRaw said…
Awesome! This looks amazing and I bet it was outrageiously delicious!!
iRaw said…
^ I got so excited over this I misspelled outrageously ! =)
janelle said…
I love 30 Rock too. Tina Fey is my favorite actress. I will watch anything if she's in it, lol.

I loved your gf's description of you. I think there's a religion called Jain's that wear cheesecloth over their faces so they don't harm living things in the air and sweep as they walk so they don't accidently squish any bugs. I might be wrong... but if there was you could join them, lol!
quarrygirl said…
you two crack me the fuck up!
Unknown said…
haha that is GREAT! you and your gf are quite funny ;)
and that recipe sounds absolutely amaazing..i love cherries, probably one of my favorites..so i'm sure that would be so delicious. thanks!! (you always have the BEST recipes..)
My husband and I love 30 Rock! Tina Fey cracks me up!

The gratin looks so good! I wish I had a bowl of that right now!